The ShanMonster vs. Good Lonesome Guy

Good Lonesome Guy: marry me

ShanMonster: That's illegal.

Good Lonesome Guy: send you my pic?

ShanMonster: In lieu of a diamond ring?

Good Lonesome Guy: how many carats?

ShanMonster: I know a picture is supposed to be worth a thousand words, but I don't know how many carats it works out to.

Good Lonesome Guy: mind me send you a pic?

ShanMonster: Wait a minute. Let's backtrack here, okay? Why would you ask a total stranger to marry you?

Good Lonesome Guy: i am leaving for the states and i need someone show me around

ShanMonster: Tour guides can do that, and you don't even have to marry them. Also, I'm not American.

Good Lonesome Guy: so you dont want me make you happy. ok

ShanMonster: No, I'm not about to get American citizenship to make a complete stranger happy.

Good Lonesome Guy: ?! i am not into that! :( you got me wrong..i am on my way to canada..i dislike states. :(

ShanMonster: Then why did you say you wanted someone to show you around America?

Good Lonesome Guy: have to go there first

ShanMonster: In any case, I'm off to work. Good luck finding a mystery bride.